Showing posts with label aggression. Show all posts
Showing posts with label aggression. Show all posts

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Tag along friends, and problems with Ambien and Mormonism

There's this woman named Cindy who's a tag-along friend to a sister of mine. She was unfortunately converted to Mormonism in Ohio while my sister was there on a Mormon mission. Cindy has an issue with knowing what to say when. She's been fired from many jobs not only for this, but also for stealing money. She's also stolen money from my father. She's rather like a leech.

One additional key issue is that Cindy acts like she is a family member, a sister, and she takes liberties assuming she is, liberties revolving around making snide and derogatory and cutting remarks when other "family members" (according to her small brain) act in a way which she doesn't like.

In December of 2010 I dumped Cindy from my facebook friend list. During that holiday season I decided to have less contact with other people because of some epiphany work I was going through. She became angry at this and made a cutting remark then. Then I dropped her from my facebook friend list.

Subsequently I heard that she had stolen money from my father (hearing this from him), and that she was continuing to ask for money on a frequent basis from him.

My sister who went on a Mormon mission to Ohio has had a problem with Ambien. She also used to live the life of a rich woman, spending her days in the fluffy dream world of someone who need only concern herself with clothes, shoes, horse riding & training, spas, facials, and so on. Then her now ex-husband went bankrupt and she divorced him. Then she went straight onto Ambien. And Cindy was there during the Ambien years, acting as a bad influence, and apparently helping my sister get even more Ambien.

You know how some pretty women have tag along less pretty friends? Well, Cindy is the much less pretty one, and she's also been a bad influence - especially during the high Ambien fuelded druggie days of my sister.

My sister is in recovery from Ambien, and her brain is slowly coming back. But there's still division in our family revolving around her own past addiction and choice to use that terrible drug. But I think that division is also connected to Mormonism.

So now we come again to the wedding of another sister of mine. This Cindy woman was invited to another sisters wedding, because this other sister lives far away and is fairly disconnected from what's happening with the family back in Utah - by her own choice. But because she's disconnected she doesn't know that it's not really possible to just assume things are a certain way when they are not.

From the first entrance of myself & my wife into the wedding room Cindy demanded to know why I dumped her as a Facebook friend in December of 2010. I told her I didn't want to talk about it. Later she asked if she could take a picture of myself, my wife, and our new son, because she claimed she was doing this as a favor to my sister who was getting married. I told her "no thank you." Then she said "your loss."

As I was preparing to leave with my new family I walked over to Cindy and told her "stay the fuck away from me - you are not part of our family." She responded "how rude." But this woman has spent her life making rude and cutting remarks to other people.

My Ambien-damaged sister should realize that when people were upset that she was destroying her life with her use of that terrible drug, that we were trying to do her and everyone a favor.

In Utah there's a lot of women on anti-depressants. Why? Because Mormonism drives them fucking crazy. So perhaps it's understandable why one of my sisters went down that path. But, on the other hand, I have no obligation to treat as a sister a friend of hers who tries the take the liberty of assuming she's a sister of mine. And, I also am not particularly pleased at the turmoil Ambien, and indirectly & directly Mormonism, has played a roll in dividing my family and keeping us apart. Also if it weren't for Mormonism, this retarded fat ugly rude tag along woman named Cindy would have never come to Utah, as a moocher and tag along little puppy friend to my Amdien-damaged sister.

Now, as my own father has dementia, and as our family drifts apart, at the very least I have my own new family.

When you see how fucked up your own older family can become, at the very least you can determine to try to do something different with your own. And one important thing to recognize is that passive aggression is still aggression. Mormon people are famous for this. They say they love you and want to care for you. But they also believe your views of the world are evil. So in the end they really aren't nice people.

People who believe you're going to hell (or in their case, not to the highest level of heaven) because you don't kiss the ass of their god & prophet aren't nice people, no matter how many batches of cookies they may also bring to your door in the mean time. It's a means to an end for them.

And, if it weren't for Mormonism, my sister would probably have never gotten a divorce, and would have never been on Ambien (hopefully). Also another sister would never have felt the need to leave Utah, live the life of a traveling partying rebel, and not had a family of her own - because of her apparent distaste for the stuffiness of ultra-conservative Mormonism. Salt Lake has become much more liberal while she was away though. But one key thing to keep in mind is that religion can and does divide families, keep them apart, and destroy lives in the process. Unless you're educated about what the facts really are, you have no idea.

There can be some good that comes from religion, and religion is a natural phenomena. So it is a mixed bag, with good and bad, extreme damage and some good happening simultaneously. The more honest a religion can be the better though - the ones that allow their members to be intellectually and emotionally honest while still being a member. The more conservative a religion is the less this tends to be allowed though.